Till Debt Do Us Part
In my office at my home, I have a framed, long, thin poster. The heading on the poster simply says, “Success is:” then there is a list of dozens of traits and factors that can create success in our personal and professional lives. The number one item on the list states, “Marry the right person.” Obviously, there’s a lot that goes into finding and selecting the right person, but one thing we know for sure is that the leading cause of divorce in our society is financial pressure.
Warren Buffett has said, “You can’t tell who is swimming naked until the tide goes out.” Debt is one of the dangerous hidden factors both in our personal and professional lives. Today, while less than one percent of home mortgages are in foreclosure, eight percent of credit card accounts and over ten percent of student loans are in default. This debt is often combined and brought into a marriage.
On top of these pre-existing financial conditions, the average wedding today costs $30,000, and more than one in eight weddings exceeds $40,000. From the outside looking in, you might think these big weddings show more commitment to the relationship which might signal longer lasting successful marriages. Ironically, the opposite is true.
Research at Emory University actually shows that the more you spend on your wedding, the shorter your marriage is likely to be. Researchers feel that, in addition to the debt and financial pressure, creating a wedding extravaganza causes more focus on the wedding day and less on the marriage itself. Additional research findings show that a larger guest list did not adversely impact the success of the marriage if the couple eliminated or reduced many of the costly elements.
Young gentlemen looking for the appropriate engagement ring before they pop the question, might want to know that research reveals that if you spend over $2,000 on an engagement ring, your marriage is 1.3 times more likely to end in divorce than a young groom who spends between $500 and $2,000 for the ring. There are enough challenges in having a long and successful relationship without the burden of debt and the pressure to keep up with the Joneses in the bridal magazines and wedding TV shows.
As you go through your day today, focus on your relationship and not the wedding.
Today’s the day!